Brutality of Penguins: Local Leader Creates Murder Bus

Somewhere on the West Coast, United States – The new year began with a bang, but instead of fireworks, it was the downtrodden bodies of virtual penguin troops. On January 3, a local accountant, Calgo, only accounted for bodies as he stole a bus and ran over his “troops” as a form of recruitment.

Club Penguin Armies was created alongside the development of the late Club Penguin. Owned by Disney, the game has been resurrected by fans numerous times since its closure in 2017. On every occasion, Disney has eventually forced each to close. The latest crackdown led to three being arrested for copyright violations by the City of London Police in April 2022. Its demise preceded the closure of other, less popular private servers, leading Disney to believe all were defeated.

Calgo’s arrest proved differently. After being dared by a fellow community member, he promptly stole a bus, redecorating it with group colors and his penguin mascots. His goal was simple: to recruit as many new members to his discord server as possible. Equipped with a green penguin bus, Calgo drove around hoping to inspire them to follow his invite link.

Calgo claimed the promotional move was necessary in the age of a dying community. Upon his arrest, Calgo admitted he hoped to draw them in and convince them to make penguins in the latest game: Club Penguin Army Battleground. His admission has since led Disney to take legal action, continuing its crackdown on copycat versions of the popular game. In the end, Calgo demonstrated his driving capabilities were limited to virtual reality, killing numerous along the way and painting his stolen bus red instead of green.

Disney’s incessant hatred of fan-made private servers results in a community on his final legs. With leaders desperate for additional members, it was only a matter of time before someone finally lost their sense and declared war on the real world. Police have not yet formally charged Calgo, but one thing is for sure, he will finally touch some grass.

comedy signature

3 Responses

  1. real

  2. Calgo needs to touch grass

  3. […] comes after Calgo was accused of running over troops with his “murder bus,” (read more here). He then yelled at CPA members to withdraw all their money, seemingly to steal it from them and […]

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: